Wednesday, September 3, 2025
Dear Erica,
I recently applied for a new restaurant job while still working at my current place. I believe the new place called my manager, and instead of just confirming my employment, my manager made negative comments to try to keep me from leaving. Is that even legal?
– Sabotaged by Petty Middle Management
You’ve polished your résumé, nailed the interview, and found a restaurant job that doesn’t require psychic powers just to get your schedule.
But just as things are looking up, your manager decides to sabotage you by badmouthing you when the new place calls to verify your employment and they’re dropping snide little grenades scaring everyone off. Maybe take it as a compliment although sabotage can end poorly. However, let’s talk about whether
Here’s the boring but important part:
employers are usually allowed to confirm your dates of employment, job title, and sometimes pay.
That’s the safe script HR departments love, because it keeps them out of lawsuits. And whether they can share your pay is a legal landmine of its own.
But managers? Sometimes they go off-script. And technically, they can share performance-related opinions.
If your manager gave their opinion (“She’s unreliable,” “He’s not a team player”), that’s not automatically illegal. But if what they said was false and it hurt your chances of getting hired, we’re flirting with a defamation claim. Truth, as they say, is a full legal defense.
The line gets crossed when your manager lies.
If they say you stole, or claim you were fired when you weren’t, that’s called defamation. And if those lies cost you a job, you’re no longer just annoyed; you might have a legal claim.
Some states give employers “immunity” for references given in good faith, but that protection disappears when they knowingly spread falsehoods.
Translation: spiteful lies can = lawsuit bait.
Protect Yourself From Sabotage
- Redirect Calls: Tell future employers to confirm your info with HR, not your manager. HR knows how to stay boring. If you don’t have HR, think of payroll or a bookkeeper since they are often neutral.
- Check Policy: Many companies actually forbid managers from giving references beyond “yes, they work here.” If your boss broke policy, that’s another point in your favor.
- Ask Directly: You’re allowed to ask the prospective employer what was said, and sometimes they’ll tell you.
- Lawyer Up, if Necessary: If you can prove your manager lied and it cost you the job, that’s when “talking to an attorney” stops being hypothetical.
The Takeaway
Yes, your manager can say more than your job title. But when they weaponize the reference out of spite, they’re the one skating on thin ice. And honestly?
If your boss is so desperate to keep you that they resort to character assassination, maybe you should leave them with the only review that matters:
your resignation.